Beowulf, performed by Benjamin Bagby on a friggin' harp

Koko: Dicey at times but worth the drunken Swedes who get eaten, the gigantic beer-bench where medieval McNulties, having been screwed by 8th century Burrells and such, go to let off steam, and definitely worth the sad right arm of that swamp monster, whose only sin was, well, killing and eating a few dozen Swedes, including medieval, blonde McNulties. You may have heard many things, but a tale of supernatural revenge plucked out gracefully on a reconstructed Anglo-Saxon harp? Not likely. The DVD also features a roundtable discussion: prosodist and living god Tom Cable cutting through the masturbatory fog of academia to guide you safely home, like a lonely lighthouse spelling out Sievers' five types in the philological gloom. And by the way, before they got a hold of steel, Germans were just fine. Godless and indecent, but, you know, basically okay.