Birthday doesn't get enough PR; behold her corpulence. Also behold her front teeth, prominently displayed as her upper lip stuck on the cage bar one afternoon during a nap:.JPG)
We call her Church on account of a series of phonetic substitutions tracing back to her Christian name: Birthday begot Girthday, which begot Girth, which begot Smirch, which begot Church. In Hebrew her name means "don't touch me; I hate you."
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